I still stand by my claim, that nothing really surprises me anymore. But that doesn’t mean I’m immune to being floored. This past weekend I was called, “daddy,” and in the most G-rated way possible. I had thought about the possibility of my soon to be step-daughter using that word on me, but I didn’t really think it would happen. It’s the most flattering, yet terrifying word she could utter. And I never took to the time to Google how I should handle the situation. Truth be told, I kinda wish I could be “daddy” but, she has a father and it’s his right to be the only dad in her life and I have zero interest in getting between them or doing anything to undermine their relationship. I’m not sure how to make her understand this, and I pride myself on being able to talk to kids, but maybe that’s just because I can look them in the eye without bending down.
***
I very much dislike the feeling of sitting on a cold toilet. I’m sure there have been some studies that have concluded the shock to one’s body from sitting on a cold toilet seat is on par with brain freeze. But to sit on a warm toilet seat has to be one of the most disgusting things a human can legally be put through.
***
The on going debate in our home has been; which is the correct way to stir. The lady stirs clockwise, citing the earth’s rotation and professional mixers as evidence that her way is correct. Other evidence introduced is the fact that her mother and grandmother also subscribe to the clockwise motion. Now I stir counter-clockwise, also known as the “correct way.” It just makes more sense. How do you draw a circle or write the letter “O”? You use the counter-clockwise motion of course, unless you’re left-handed, but then you don’t really count as a person anyway. You just pull the spoon, or whatever utensil you may be using, towards your body. It’s more economical, and although I have no proof, I’m sure it’s also more effective. So powers at be, I ask you, please offer a grant so that some University can research this matter and officially back me up on this.
***
Now I’ve been working the same job for a little over a year now. And when people ask me what I do, I’m able to give them my title “Program/Project Manager” and a broad explanation of what it is that I do here. It isn’t that I don’t want to get into it. No, I really don’t know. It’s starting to bother me, and I’m getting more and more stressed by this fact. It won’t be long till I actually do something about it, like you know, try and learn my job. But if they’re gonna find out and fire me, I just hope it’s after the wedding. You can’t fire someone whose planning a wedding, can you? That’s one tier below firing a pregnant woman.
***
Speaking of work, I was recently assigned a new project. So I was starting to stress about it, so much in fact that I didn’t sleep well. So poorly in fact, that I woke up at 4am. So awake in fact, that I drove my ass to work at 5:30 so I could start working on the project. It actually went better than I expected. And I really don’t hate going in that early, it’s a lot easier for me to go in early than it is to stay late. I spend the entire day with one eye on the clock, waiting for the time where I improperly shut off my laptop, grab my shit and head for the door. Just so I can get home and hit the couch, but I move like I have a real purpose. So needless to say, last night I was tired as hell. And that’s a dangerous cycle to mess around with. I really don’t want to start coming to work at 5:30. Leaving the house at 6:45, as I normally do, is early enough.
***
So I was reading a story about this little girl in Texas. Her body was found, and for months they didn’t know who she was. Well they found out who did it and arrested her mother and father, if that isn’t losing a couple of terms loosely then I don’t know what is. Anyway, this won’t sound right but stay with me. It isn’t that I can accept when a parent snaps, and does something awful and it results in the death of their child, but I can somewhat understand it. Something snapped, they obviously weren’t equipped to handle having a child and they fucked up and did something horrible. I can understand that to some extent, but to torture a kid like these sick fucks did? It’s beyond twisted. On the totem pole of pieces of shit, the parent that snaps and kills their child is at the bottom. But parents like these? They deserve their very own totem pole. Even though I don’t believe in it, I hope there is a hell, just so they can go there.
November 28, 2007
November 19, 2007
Case of the Mondays
Whoever designed the packaging for children’s toys needs to be tied down, and have their toenails ripped out one by one while listening to Billy Ray Cyrus’ Greatest Hits. This weekend was my first stab at hosting a birthday party for a kid. Kids literally salivate at opening a new toy, and these sadistic bastards make it a 30 minute process which leaves little pieces of box, ties and tape scattered throughout your home for you to find over the next 4-5 months.
Used to be my trick too, I used to give my nieces, nephews and my friends kids gifts with tons of little pieces. It was hysterical to me, now it’s not funny. Sure I had it coming, but wait till I get your 10 year-old a subscription to Playboy. Or share with them the secrets of sneaking out. Let’s see how you like it when I let your kids listen to my entire Tupac catalog. Wonda why they call ya bitch, great song for a 7 year old to learn. It’s an evil game, and I never should have done it. But that was my gig, try and make me pay for it, and I’ll spend my life one upping you. I have that kind of time. As long as my wife says I do.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Saw American Gangster over the weekend. Quality flick, fell a little short of meeting my expectations, but worth seeing and owning. Denzel should shelve the good guy and Detective roles for a while; he really plays a great bad guy. Josh Brolin, in a role that seemed tailor made for Ray Liotta, did some scene stealing. I don’t think I’ve liked him since Goonies.
Used to be my trick too, I used to give my nieces, nephews and my friends kids gifts with tons of little pieces. It was hysterical to me, now it’s not funny. Sure I had it coming, but wait till I get your 10 year-old a subscription to Playboy. Or share with them the secrets of sneaking out. Let’s see how you like it when I let your kids listen to my entire Tupac catalog. Wonda why they call ya bitch, great song for a 7 year old to learn. It’s an evil game, and I never should have done it. But that was my gig, try and make me pay for it, and I’ll spend my life one upping you. I have that kind of time. As long as my wife says I do.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Saw American Gangster over the weekend. Quality flick, fell a little short of meeting my expectations, but worth seeing and owning. Denzel should shelve the good guy and Detective roles for a while; he really plays a great bad guy. Josh Brolin, in a role that seemed tailor made for Ray Liotta, did some scene stealing. I don’t think I’ve liked him since Goonies.
November 12, 2007
Childs Play
As a kid, I was never a huge fan of animated movies. I loved my Saturday Morning Cartoons, but the typical Disney movies didn’t interest me. Not until I took my niece and nephew to their first movie, The Lion King. That movie kicked ass. Since then, while I haven’t made an effort to see all the kid movies, I’ve seen most of the big ones. And they have been some of the most creative and entertaining movies of the past 15 years.
So yesterday I went with the wife-to-be, the kid and some friends to see Bee Movie, for which I was really looking forward to seeing. And it didn’t disappoint. It’s great to see Jerry Seinfeld doing something again, and he’s a genius for taking so long after his show went off the air to get back in the spotlight. And even a greater genius for taking this route. He knows and we know, he’s no great actor. So he didn’t try to reinvent the wheel with this, he just tried to entertain us and the kids.
And the cast is nothing short of impressive. Matthew Broderick, Renee Zellwegger, Chris Rock, Larry Miller, John Goodman, Oprah (I didn’t realize it till I imdb’d it) Megan Mullally, Rip Torn, Michael Richards (which makes it almost like career rehab) Larry King, Sting and Ray Liotta (three of the more interesting cameos you’ll see). I can’t skip the animation staple, Patrick Warburton, formerly known as Puddy from “Seinfeld.” This guy has been in almost every kids movie and show your kid has seen. You know the voice; you heard it in The Emperor’s New Groove, “Buzz Lightyear of Star Command”, Kim Possible, “The Tick,” Chicken Little and now you see him in the very under-rated “Rules of Engagement.”
So check it out, and also rent Surf’s Up. Yeah, I don’t see myself growing up anytime soon. I think being of the stature that I am, helps me get away with being a 30 year old kid.
The movie wasn’t the extent of my child like weekend. There was the birthday party, of which most of my readers were also in attendance. This place, My Gym, fantastic. Never mind the kids, I want to go run around and play. It was like “American Gladiators” out there, complete with a round of joust. This should be available to adults; it’d be a great “Team building activity” and an even better way to whoop your bosses’ ass without getting canned.
For a while, I made a real effort to kind of watch my language on here. But now that more and more of my posts deal with family related activities, I feel compelled to drop a few “fucks” or “shits” from time to time, its hard to maintain one’s edge when talking about weddings, animation and birthday parties. However, it’s pretty easy to say “fuck” when a kid is being a world class shit.
So yesterday I went with the wife-to-be, the kid and some friends to see Bee Movie, for which I was really looking forward to seeing. And it didn’t disappoint. It’s great to see Jerry Seinfeld doing something again, and he’s a genius for taking so long after his show went off the air to get back in the spotlight. And even a greater genius for taking this route. He knows and we know, he’s no great actor. So he didn’t try to reinvent the wheel with this, he just tried to entertain us and the kids.
And the cast is nothing short of impressive. Matthew Broderick, Renee Zellwegger, Chris Rock, Larry Miller, John Goodman, Oprah (I didn’t realize it till I imdb’d it) Megan Mullally, Rip Torn, Michael Richards (which makes it almost like career rehab) Larry King, Sting and Ray Liotta (three of the more interesting cameos you’ll see). I can’t skip the animation staple, Patrick Warburton, formerly known as Puddy from “Seinfeld.” This guy has been in almost every kids movie and show your kid has seen. You know the voice; you heard it in The Emperor’s New Groove, “Buzz Lightyear of Star Command”, Kim Possible, “The Tick,” Chicken Little and now you see him in the very under-rated “Rules of Engagement.”
So check it out, and also rent Surf’s Up. Yeah, I don’t see myself growing up anytime soon. I think being of the stature that I am, helps me get away with being a 30 year old kid.
The movie wasn’t the extent of my child like weekend. There was the birthday party, of which most of my readers were also in attendance. This place, My Gym, fantastic. Never mind the kids, I want to go run around and play. It was like “American Gladiators” out there, complete with a round of joust. This should be available to adults; it’d be a great “Team building activity” and an even better way to whoop your bosses’ ass without getting canned.
For a while, I made a real effort to kind of watch my language on here. But now that more and more of my posts deal with family related activities, I feel compelled to drop a few “fucks” or “shits” from time to time, its hard to maintain one’s edge when talking about weddings, animation and birthday parties. However, it’s pretty easy to say “fuck” when a kid is being a world class shit.
November 09, 2007
Ten Commandments
Police in Italy recently found the Mafia’s Ten Commandments, which of course I am obligated to post here.
First, the preamble:
“I swear to be faithful to Cosa Nostra. Should I betray, my flesh will burn.”
And now the 10 Commandments, never mind those 10 found atop a mountain:
1. No one can present himself directly to another of our friends. There must be a third person to do it.
2. Never look at the wives of friends
3. Never be seen with cops.
4. Don’t go to pubs and clubs
5. Always being available for Cosa Nostra is a duty – even if your wife’s about to give birth.
6. Appointments must absolutely be respected.
7. Wives must be treated with respect.
8. When asked for any information, the answer must be the truth.
9. Money can not be appropriated if it belongs to others or to other families.
10. People can’t be part of Cosa Nostra
• Anyone who has a close relative in the police
• Anyone with a two-timing relative in the family
• Anyone who behaves badly and doesn’t hold to moral values
First, the preamble:
“I swear to be faithful to Cosa Nostra. Should I betray, my flesh will burn.”
And now the 10 Commandments, never mind those 10 found atop a mountain:
1. No one can present himself directly to another of our friends. There must be a third person to do it.
2. Never look at the wives of friends
3. Never be seen with cops.
4. Don’t go to pubs and clubs
5. Always being available for Cosa Nostra is a duty – even if your wife’s about to give birth.
6. Appointments must absolutely be respected.
7. Wives must be treated with respect.
8. When asked for any information, the answer must be the truth.
9. Money can not be appropriated if it belongs to others or to other families.
10. People can’t be part of Cosa Nostra
• Anyone who has a close relative in the police
• Anyone with a two-timing relative in the family
• Anyone who behaves badly and doesn’t hold to moral values
November 08, 2007
I Care
So there was recently a story on ABC News that I viewed on yahoo, about the quality of eyewear you find at the large chains. Well, the story didn’t exactly make any exec’s very happy, and it probably didn’t make most customers very comfortable either. Well let me assure you, it was completely true. I made glasses for over 7 years, and I was responsible for more than a few pair of shitty glasses. A lot of the blame goes on me, but you get what you pay for. Not the customer, you paid out your ass in most cases, unless you knew me. But the company, they pay nothing and treat their employees like crap.
Here’s the situation, at one of the larger chains. You work in an environment where time is the motivator. The sales team promises customers eyewear the same day, even with in an hour. And if the lab fails to make them in that time, or fails a pair and needs to remake them, they are penalized financially as well as professionally. So passing an iffy pair of glasses pays better than putting an emphasis on quality. Add into the mix the fact that you’re not working with the best machines, you’re not given the time or means to adequately train nor allowed to properly staff the lab and you get what you pay for. Never mind that they are marking up the frames and lenses as much as 300% at even the cheapest stores, the lab guys only see money if their glasses are done on time and without having to fail a pair and start over.
So really, I’d suggest you take your glasses in and have them checked again. This doesn’t go for the friends I made glasses for, those standards were much higher than the company standards. But if you’re going in for a pair in the near future, I have a couple of suggestions:
• Don’t go in right before closing time. If you hit a restaurant right before the kitchen closes, do you think your meal isn’t rushed? Anyone that has been on their feet for 8 hours wants to get out of work as fast as possible.
• Go to more of a boutique, such as Romanelli Optix, which is a proud sponsor of FromTheHirp.com. Smaller boutiques take more time, and put more of an emphasis on quality. They simply can’t afford to treat customers like cattle. I send my own family and friends there now, and not just because the owners are friends. I know what goes on at the stores in the mall.
• Think of it like this, they are basically a pharmacy for your eyes. Do you feel more comfortable going to a pharmacist where you see 18 year old kids behind the counter, or well seasoned professionals who aren’t smoking weed or lighting small fires in the back of the store? True stories, and I might have taken part in the latter story. Maybe, I might have, once or twice…
Here’s the situation, at one of the larger chains. You work in an environment where time is the motivator. The sales team promises customers eyewear the same day, even with in an hour. And if the lab fails to make them in that time, or fails a pair and needs to remake them, they are penalized financially as well as professionally. So passing an iffy pair of glasses pays better than putting an emphasis on quality. Add into the mix the fact that you’re not working with the best machines, you’re not given the time or means to adequately train nor allowed to properly staff the lab and you get what you pay for. Never mind that they are marking up the frames and lenses as much as 300% at even the cheapest stores, the lab guys only see money if their glasses are done on time and without having to fail a pair and start over.
So really, I’d suggest you take your glasses in and have them checked again. This doesn’t go for the friends I made glasses for, those standards were much higher than the company standards. But if you’re going in for a pair in the near future, I have a couple of suggestions:
• Don’t go in right before closing time. If you hit a restaurant right before the kitchen closes, do you think your meal isn’t rushed? Anyone that has been on their feet for 8 hours wants to get out of work as fast as possible.
• Go to more of a boutique, such as Romanelli Optix, which is a proud sponsor of FromTheHirp.com. Smaller boutiques take more time, and put more of an emphasis on quality. They simply can’t afford to treat customers like cattle. I send my own family and friends there now, and not just because the owners are friends. I know what goes on at the stores in the mall.
• Think of it like this, they are basically a pharmacy for your eyes. Do you feel more comfortable going to a pharmacist where you see 18 year old kids behind the counter, or well seasoned professionals who aren’t smoking weed or lighting small fires in the back of the store? True stories, and I might have taken part in the latter story. Maybe, I might have, once or twice…
November 02, 2007
November Rant, Part I
• At what point will Christmas become a year round annoyance? I saw “holiday” decorations in various retail establishments before Halloween. Are we thinking 2011, or sooner?
• I never dress up for Halloween, but that doesn’t keep me from coming up with ideas for a costume if I ever were to do so. My all-time favorite has been “Jew-Pac,” even though I googled it once and found someone else had come up with the same idea. Asshole. But my idea for this year, is regional as well as original. I’d walk around with a golden parachute and a bag of money, about $55 million. That’s right, I’d be Gary Forsee. Wonder how that would have gone over at our office costume contest. Would I win, or get fired?
• Worst apology of the week: “My sincerest, heartfelt apologies go out to every person I have offended for my regrettable use of very inappropriate language. I am deeply disappointed in myself for speaking out of anger to my son and using such a hateful term in a private phone conversation." He was on the right track, although he was full of shit, till he had to mention that it was a private phone conversation. Just a little something to make us feel bad for ease dropping? This is the guy who makes his money invading peoples homes, he’s a sensitive bitc-er..dog. Wonder how much help he’ll get from the community now, when he’s trying to catch a con. Best of all, he even said he didn’t want it coming out to the Enquirer that he was using such language and have that cost him his career. Oh the irony. And hey, get a friggin’ haircut, ass wipe.
Chapman: Don't care if she's a Mexican, a whore, whatever. It's not 'cause she's black. It's because we use the word "n_____" sometimes here. I'm not going to take a chance ever in life by losing everything I've worked for for 30 years for some f____ n_____ heard us say "n_____" and turned us in to the Enquirer magazine -- our career is over. I'm not taking that chance at all, never in life, never. Never. ... If Lyssa was dating a n_____, we would all say f___ you. And you know that. If Lyssa brought a black guy home ... It's not that they're black. It's none of that. It's that we use the word "n____." We don't mean "you f___ scum n_____ without a soul." We don't mean that s___, but America would think we're meaning that. And we're not taking a chance and losing everything we've got over a racial slur. Because our son goes with a girl like that, I can't do that, Tucker, you can't expect Garry, Bonnie, Cecily, all them young kids ... 'cause I'm in love for seven months, I ... f___ that. ... So I'll help you get another job, but you cannot work here unless you break up with her and she's out of your life. I can't handle that s___. I've got 'em in the parking lot trying to record us. I've got that girl saying she's going to wear a recorder. ...
The phrase, “never say never,” comes to mind.
• I never dress up for Halloween, but that doesn’t keep me from coming up with ideas for a costume if I ever were to do so. My all-time favorite has been “Jew-Pac,” even though I googled it once and found someone else had come up with the same idea. Asshole. But my idea for this year, is regional as well as original. I’d walk around with a golden parachute and a bag of money, about $55 million. That’s right, I’d be Gary Forsee. Wonder how that would have gone over at our office costume contest. Would I win, or get fired?
• Worst apology of the week: “My sincerest, heartfelt apologies go out to every person I have offended for my regrettable use of very inappropriate language. I am deeply disappointed in myself for speaking out of anger to my son and using such a hateful term in a private phone conversation." He was on the right track, although he was full of shit, till he had to mention that it was a private phone conversation. Just a little something to make us feel bad for ease dropping? This is the guy who makes his money invading peoples homes, he’s a sensitive bitc-er..dog. Wonder how much help he’ll get from the community now, when he’s trying to catch a con. Best of all, he even said he didn’t want it coming out to the Enquirer that he was using such language and have that cost him his career. Oh the irony. And hey, get a friggin’ haircut, ass wipe.
Chapman: Don't care if she's a Mexican, a whore, whatever. It's not 'cause she's black. It's because we use the word "n_____" sometimes here. I'm not going to take a chance ever in life by losing everything I've worked for for 30 years for some f____ n_____ heard us say "n_____" and turned us in to the Enquirer magazine -- our career is over. I'm not taking that chance at all, never in life, never. Never. ... If Lyssa was dating a n_____, we would all say f___ you. And you know that. If Lyssa brought a black guy home ... It's not that they're black. It's none of that. It's that we use the word "n____." We don't mean "you f___ scum n_____ without a soul." We don't mean that s___, but America would think we're meaning that. And we're not taking a chance and losing everything we've got over a racial slur. Because our son goes with a girl like that, I can't do that, Tucker, you can't expect Garry, Bonnie, Cecily, all them young kids ... 'cause I'm in love for seven months, I ... f___ that. ... So I'll help you get another job, but you cannot work here unless you break up with her and she's out of your life. I can't handle that s___. I've got 'em in the parking lot trying to record us. I've got that girl saying she's going to wear a recorder. ...
The phrase, “never say never,” comes to mind.
October 31, 2007
I'm Trying Here...
I ache, and this isn’t the start of my career as a trashy romance author. I’ve spent the last give days in little boxes hell. There’s been packing, unpacking, lifting and moving. Finally getting settled into the new digs, and it’s looking pretty great. There’s going to be an adjustment period, after all, I lived on the Plaza for about five years. Now I’m back in the ‘burbs. But it’s all good.
Hopefully I can get back to posting on a regular basis. I haven’t seen a movie in ages, so this weekend you can bet your ass I’m seeing American Gangster. I just hope they haven’t raised the prices since my last flick. And there’s a lot of movies out now and coming out that I want to see. Martian Child, Bee Movie, Michael Clayton, Gone Baby Gone, We Own The Night, Fred Claus, and Dan In Real Life. I might need to play hooky and spend a day at the movies. In fact, I think I’m getting the flu right now. Cough, cough.
Now the focus turns to planning a wedding. Should be a trip
Lame post, I know. But I can’t stop singing “Little Boxes” to myself long enough to form any ideas.
Hopefully I can get back to posting on a regular basis. I haven’t seen a movie in ages, so this weekend you can bet your ass I’m seeing American Gangster. I just hope they haven’t raised the prices since my last flick. And there’s a lot of movies out now and coming out that I want to see. Martian Child, Bee Movie, Michael Clayton, Gone Baby Gone, We Own The Night, Fred Claus, and Dan In Real Life. I might need to play hooky and spend a day at the movies. In fact, I think I’m getting the flu right now. Cough, cough.
Now the focus turns to planning a wedding. Should be a trip
Lame post, I know. But I can’t stop singing “Little Boxes” to myself long enough to form any ideas.
October 18, 2007
Hirpancé
I haven’t posted in what seems like a month or so, sorry ‘bout that. I’ve been a tad bit busy, getting ready to move and all. Not just once, no, I can’t do anything that simple. First we’re moving my girlfriends place, and then the following week we’ll work on moving my stuff. And in the end, we’ll have our stuff. So yeah, I should warn you now. This post is going to have a lot of comments like that; the things that make you throw up just a little bit in your mouth. The type of comments that sound real cheesy, only they are completely sincere. You’ve been warned, and I don’t want to hear about it later.
This is going to be list of things I’ve noticed since getting engaged. As I said, I don’t want to hear about it.
• I still hate the word “fiancé” but sometimes it really just makes things easier. I came home the other day, this “home” technically being her place, and the buyer was there to do the inspection. They were in the basement, so I just wanted to let them know I was there so they wouldn’t freak out if they saw me on the couch. I said yadda yadda yadda, “this is my girlfriends place.” And I stumbled for a second, more than usual even, because I considered saying fiancé instead. It just sounded more formal and appropriate. Instead I sounded like a doofus leaching off of his girlfriend. And I’m a doofus for countless reasons, but not that.
• There’s really nothing cooler than catching a newly engaged woman constantly looking down at her finger and smiling. The fact she’s engaged to you is what really makes it amazing.
• I was used to being single, and content with it. Only having to think about myself was easy. Owning a home made more sense in the long run, but being single I didn’t really care. The easier way sounded better. Owning a home meant yard work, taxes, responsibility for every little thing and mainly it meant being an adult. I want a home now. I think about a backyard, room for toys, sleepovers and Saturday morning cartoons.
• I even want to start balancing my checkbook, something I haven’t done since Clintons first term. And I will, just as soon as we get a joint account. It’s too late at this point to even try with mine.
• I wasn’t a rat pack, but I collected things. Having all my CD’s, DVD’s and even VHS movies has always been important to me. Getting rid of any of them sounded like a horrible idea. Well, I just tossed the VHS tapes I had purchased DVD’s for and gave up on the idea that I needed to keep them. I sold some CD’s I haven’t listened to since the late 90s and decided if I ever wanted them back for the one or two songs I still like on each, I can just download them. Legally of course.
• I’m about to break some guy code here, but oh well. Going into my last poker game, I was expected to catch a fire storm of shit from the guys. God knows I’ve dished it out over the past three years with an uncountable amount of jokes about kids and marriage. But I pretty much only received was congratulations, and one guy telling me I should have talked to him before so he could talk me out of it. I don’t even know who he was. I even had the 5 year old daughter of our host come up and tap me on the arm and with a big toothless smile say, “congratulations!” Poker night isn’t supposed to have cute moments like that, but it did and it was the first thing I talked about after the game when I got home. Chicks love that shit, but so do we, only we just won’t admit it.
• Another thing about poker night. The drive home after a poor night at the table was always horrible. Reliving every mistake over and over lead to a sleep deprived night. Now there’s something to look forward to when I get home.
• Even my blog has changed. I swear I’m still the same cynical grumpy bastard deep down inside, still the same ol’ Hirp. I’m even looking forward to really getting into the planning of the wedding, because my fingers salivate at the promise of dealing with incompetent and moronic people in an industry I know nothing about.
This is going to be list of things I’ve noticed since getting engaged. As I said, I don’t want to hear about it.
• I still hate the word “fiancé” but sometimes it really just makes things easier. I came home the other day, this “home” technically being her place, and the buyer was there to do the inspection. They were in the basement, so I just wanted to let them know I was there so they wouldn’t freak out if they saw me on the couch. I said yadda yadda yadda, “this is my girlfriends place.” And I stumbled for a second, more than usual even, because I considered saying fiancé instead. It just sounded more formal and appropriate. Instead I sounded like a doofus leaching off of his girlfriend. And I’m a doofus for countless reasons, but not that.
• There’s really nothing cooler than catching a newly engaged woman constantly looking down at her finger and smiling. The fact she’s engaged to you is what really makes it amazing.
• I was used to being single, and content with it. Only having to think about myself was easy. Owning a home made more sense in the long run, but being single I didn’t really care. The easier way sounded better. Owning a home meant yard work, taxes, responsibility for every little thing and mainly it meant being an adult. I want a home now. I think about a backyard, room for toys, sleepovers and Saturday morning cartoons.
• I even want to start balancing my checkbook, something I haven’t done since Clintons first term. And I will, just as soon as we get a joint account. It’s too late at this point to even try with mine.
• I wasn’t a rat pack, but I collected things. Having all my CD’s, DVD’s and even VHS movies has always been important to me. Getting rid of any of them sounded like a horrible idea. Well, I just tossed the VHS tapes I had purchased DVD’s for and gave up on the idea that I needed to keep them. I sold some CD’s I haven’t listened to since the late 90s and decided if I ever wanted them back for the one or two songs I still like on each, I can just download them. Legally of course.
• I’m about to break some guy code here, but oh well. Going into my last poker game, I was expected to catch a fire storm of shit from the guys. God knows I’ve dished it out over the past three years with an uncountable amount of jokes about kids and marriage. But I pretty much only received was congratulations, and one guy telling me I should have talked to him before so he could talk me out of it. I don’t even know who he was. I even had the 5 year old daughter of our host come up and tap me on the arm and with a big toothless smile say, “congratulations!” Poker night isn’t supposed to have cute moments like that, but it did and it was the first thing I talked about after the game when I got home. Chicks love that shit, but so do we, only we just won’t admit it.
• Another thing about poker night. The drive home after a poor night at the table was always horrible. Reliving every mistake over and over lead to a sleep deprived night. Now there’s something to look forward to when I get home.
• Even my blog has changed. I swear I’m still the same cynical grumpy bastard deep down inside, still the same ol’ Hirp. I’m even looking forward to really getting into the planning of the wedding, because my fingers salivate at the promise of dealing with incompetent and moronic people in an industry I know nothing about.
October 09, 2007
It's a Girl!
No, the title doesn't mean what you think it means. You have to keep reading.
Needless to say (another stupid phrase, if it’s needless to say then why am I saying it and why do you want to read it?) the past few days have been pretty amazing. I don’t know that I’ve ever been this excited. Not just about getting married, but finally being able to live together. We’ve wanted to live together for a while now, but there were some issues with a third party that prevented that from happening. The third party being an ex-husband. Part of me would really love to rant here about everything that took place, but I’m taking the high road and there aren’t rest stops or exits on this road.
So we’re finally going to live together. Mesh my stuff and her stuff, and make it our stuff. It’s gonna be a blast. I’m a guy that actually likes figuring out how to lay out a home, where to put the furniture and more importantly, stereo equipment and video game consoles. Basically, all the things that constitute making a life together are exactly what I’m looking forward to. Even the jokes about my balls, being in a jar or some how no longer belonging to me, that I’ll undoubtedly hear at the next poker game. And let’s be honest, I’ve earned every one of those jokes because I’ve been making them for years.
But Coco, aka Shixa, brings something else to the table, something that is slightly more than a decoration or piece of property we will find a place for. She has a little girl, who I mentioned was such a big help in the Belgium waffle adventure. So for all intensive purporses, I’m basically going to be a dad. Not really a dad, but sorta. She has a father, and I’m not here to push him out of the picture, to replace him, to one up him or steal his thunder. He’s daddy. I’m Greggy, aka G, and that’s all I want to be. I learned a lot when my brother-in-law passed away, and no matter what, you can’t replace someone’s father. Good dads, bad dads, over-bearing pops, or wrapped around a littler finger. It doesn’t matter, there’s one dad. All I can do, and all I want to do is be a friend and hopefully a positive role model. That probably requires I say “fuck” a little less frequently. Shit. Do I hide my Tupac CDs? Do I have to give away Grand Theft Auto? Do I need a belt clip for my cell phone? When is the appropriate time to teach her how to play poker? I think I might be sick.
But we were talking last night, as we watched “Two And a Half Men,” and Jake was fielding calls from some girl. I asked her how kids did that these days, how do t hey get go through the agony of calling someone for the first time and having to deal with a parent that answers the phone, in a day and age where so many house holds don’t have a home phone. So we briefly talked about what age would be right to get her daughter her first cell phone.
Now, call me old fashion, but I can’t picture giving her one before she’s 16. It’s probably not old fashion, I’m sure it has to do with the fact that I couldn’t have a pager at 14, and if I couldn’t then she shouldn’t have the equivalent. That’s mature huh? But then it went from talking about cell phones, to wondering when boys would start calling and she’d start dating. I’m looking forward to that less than I’m looking forward to my next dentist appointment. And I can put off a dentist appointment like a procrastinating champion.
This is a great kid I’m talking and worrying about. She’s funny, sweet, super smart and ornery as hell. Boys are going to be interested, and I want them to be. I hope her generation has such good taste; I just don’t want her to be interested. She should spend her time reading, studying, learning karate, cheering for the Mets, making money in after school card games so she can pay for school when she goes to KU and sees them finally win a National Championship. Then she can become the General Manager for the Mets and get me a World Series Title. No pressure though. Or she can do whatever she wants, just as long as she waits to date. Nothing unreasonable, same deal I made with my nieces. No boys until she’s 35 or I’m dead, whichever happens last.
Needless to say (another stupid phrase, if it’s needless to say then why am I saying it and why do you want to read it?) the past few days have been pretty amazing. I don’t know that I’ve ever been this excited. Not just about getting married, but finally being able to live together. We’ve wanted to live together for a while now, but there were some issues with a third party that prevented that from happening. The third party being an ex-husband. Part of me would really love to rant here about everything that took place, but I’m taking the high road and there aren’t rest stops or exits on this road.
So we’re finally going to live together. Mesh my stuff and her stuff, and make it our stuff. It’s gonna be a blast. I’m a guy that actually likes figuring out how to lay out a home, where to put the furniture and more importantly, stereo equipment and video game consoles. Basically, all the things that constitute making a life together are exactly what I’m looking forward to. Even the jokes about my balls, being in a jar or some how no longer belonging to me, that I’ll undoubtedly hear at the next poker game. And let’s be honest, I’ve earned every one of those jokes because I’ve been making them for years.
But Coco, aka Shixa, brings something else to the table, something that is slightly more than a decoration or piece of property we will find a place for. She has a little girl, who I mentioned was such a big help in the Belgium waffle adventure. So for all intensive purporses, I’m basically going to be a dad. Not really a dad, but sorta. She has a father, and I’m not here to push him out of the picture, to replace him, to one up him or steal his thunder. He’s daddy. I’m Greggy, aka G, and that’s all I want to be. I learned a lot when my brother-in-law passed away, and no matter what, you can’t replace someone’s father. Good dads, bad dads, over-bearing pops, or wrapped around a littler finger. It doesn’t matter, there’s one dad. All I can do, and all I want to do is be a friend and hopefully a positive role model. That probably requires I say “fuck” a little less frequently. Shit. Do I hide my Tupac CDs? Do I have to give away Grand Theft Auto? Do I need a belt clip for my cell phone? When is the appropriate time to teach her how to play poker? I think I might be sick.
But we were talking last night, as we watched “Two And a Half Men,” and Jake was fielding calls from some girl. I asked her how kids did that these days, how do t hey get go through the agony of calling someone for the first time and having to deal with a parent that answers the phone, in a day and age where so many house holds don’t have a home phone. So we briefly talked about what age would be right to get her daughter her first cell phone.
Now, call me old fashion, but I can’t picture giving her one before she’s 16. It’s probably not old fashion, I’m sure it has to do with the fact that I couldn’t have a pager at 14, and if I couldn’t then she shouldn’t have the equivalent. That’s mature huh? But then it went from talking about cell phones, to wondering when boys would start calling and she’d start dating. I’m looking forward to that less than I’m looking forward to my next dentist appointment. And I can put off a dentist appointment like a procrastinating champion.
This is a great kid I’m talking and worrying about. She’s funny, sweet, super smart and ornery as hell. Boys are going to be interested, and I want them to be. I hope her generation has such good taste; I just don’t want her to be interested. She should spend her time reading, studying, learning karate, cheering for the Mets, making money in after school card games so she can pay for school when she goes to KU and sees them finally win a National Championship. Then she can become the General Manager for the Mets and get me a World Series Title. No pressure though. Or she can do whatever she wants, just as long as she waits to date. Nothing unreasonable, same deal I made with my nieces. No boys until she’s 35 or I’m dead, whichever happens last.
October 03, 2007
She Said Yes!!!
I try to be pretty open and honest on my blog, and that includes touching upon pretty personal items from time to time. But a few weeks ago, I began a process that I just couldn’t write about. I wanted to, but it’s a surprise. Then today it dawned on me, I could start writing my posts as I normally would, only I won’t post them till the appropriate time. Could make for some interesting reading.
September 28th, 2007
I bought a ring. I wish I had started writing about this from the start, a few weeks ago when I started looking around with a friend of mine, but no one’s perfect.
Now let me say it again. I bought a ring. Did you hear me? I purchased a ring. Um, I don’t wear jewelry. So you may have pieced this together, the ring isn’t for me. It’s what they call an engagement ring. How ya like them apples?
I don’t have it yet, but it’s scheduled to arrive next week. And next Saturday I have scheduled a night with some friends, and at some point during this evening I will ask a pretty significant question.
There’s something worth mentioning here. I’ve always been pretty anxious, in all sorts of situations. It’s just in my DNA. Playing poker, I still get anxious. I’ve skipped more meals than Nicole Richie, when I’ve had to make big decisions. But I haven’t missed a meal since I started thinking that this is what I wanted to do. Translation, I’m not at all nervous about this. Now, that might change come next Saturday when it’s time to pop the question, but the fact that I’m not nervous now is pretty huge.
September 30th
I’m sure it’s not a fact, I haven’t done any studies or even Google it. But ever since I purchased the ring, I think one out of three commercials on the radio has been about weddings, engagement rings or something matrimonial in nature. Kind of like when you're hungry, all you hear about is food.
October 2nd
So the ring was ordered from an jeweler in Ohio, and was to arrive via UPS today. I gave my parent address, because I just don’t seem to be around my place often. I checked online to see the status, and found that they had attempted to deliver it but no one was there to sign for it. Sonuvabitch. Okay, no big deal. I called and found out I can go by UPS and pick it up tonight. Oh wait, not till 8:30. That’s not real convenient. Also just found out that my shixa (girlfriend) just received an offer on her condo, which has been on the market for a few months. I really want to do this tonight. If she decides to sell, that’s just fine. But she should have all the info right?
I get the ring, and I’ve spent all day debating how to do it. Finally, I picked the way that seemed to fit us both as well as a sure fire way to surprise her. This is important to me. Not to knock those other guys and couples, but I never wanted to be a guy who went ring shopping with the girl. I don’t want her to know its coming. Which I’m hearing now, is really pretty brave of me. We haven’t discussed marriage, so there is a chance I could get a less than desirable answer. I know the chances of this are slim and none, but I have to entertain the idea.
I’m actually not going to discuss the how in this forum. That’s a story for the soon-to-be Mrs. Hirp to share.
She said yes, and that’s all that matters. Now if you don’t I mind, I have a wedding to plan. Could make for some interesting reading.
September 28th, 2007
I bought a ring. I wish I had started writing about this from the start, a few weeks ago when I started looking around with a friend of mine, but no one’s perfect.
Now let me say it again. I bought a ring. Did you hear me? I purchased a ring. Um, I don’t wear jewelry. So you may have pieced this together, the ring isn’t for me. It’s what they call an engagement ring. How ya like them apples?
I don’t have it yet, but it’s scheduled to arrive next week. And next Saturday I have scheduled a night with some friends, and at some point during this evening I will ask a pretty significant question.
There’s something worth mentioning here. I’ve always been pretty anxious, in all sorts of situations. It’s just in my DNA. Playing poker, I still get anxious. I’ve skipped more meals than Nicole Richie, when I’ve had to make big decisions. But I haven’t missed a meal since I started thinking that this is what I wanted to do. Translation, I’m not at all nervous about this. Now, that might change come next Saturday when it’s time to pop the question, but the fact that I’m not nervous now is pretty huge.
September 30th
I’m sure it’s not a fact, I haven’t done any studies or even Google it. But ever since I purchased the ring, I think one out of three commercials on the radio has been about weddings, engagement rings or something matrimonial in nature. Kind of like when you're hungry, all you hear about is food.
October 2nd
So the ring was ordered from an jeweler in Ohio, and was to arrive via UPS today. I gave my parent address, because I just don’t seem to be around my place often. I checked online to see the status, and found that they had attempted to deliver it but no one was there to sign for it. Sonuvabitch. Okay, no big deal. I called and found out I can go by UPS and pick it up tonight. Oh wait, not till 8:30. That’s not real convenient. Also just found out that my shixa (girlfriend) just received an offer on her condo, which has been on the market for a few months. I really want to do this tonight. If she decides to sell, that’s just fine. But she should have all the info right?
I get the ring, and I’ve spent all day debating how to do it. Finally, I picked the way that seemed to fit us both as well as a sure fire way to surprise her. This is important to me. Not to knock those other guys and couples, but I never wanted to be a guy who went ring shopping with the girl. I don’t want her to know its coming. Which I’m hearing now, is really pretty brave of me. We haven’t discussed marriage, so there is a chance I could get a less than desirable answer. I know the chances of this are slim and none, but I have to entertain the idea.
I’m actually not going to discuss the how in this forum. That’s a story for the soon-to-be Mrs. Hirp to share.
She said yes, and that’s all that matters. Now if you don’t I mind, I have a wedding to plan. Could make for some interesting reading.
September 28, 2007
Gotta Believe?
How’s the ol’ saying go? Something about walking in another man’s shoes, and it never really seemed all that plausible. I can’t walk in someone’s shows, and that’s just a tad bit gross. Well over the past two weeks my New York Mets have some how pulled of some Houdini move, and replaced my familiar footwear with that of Cub fans and Red Sox fans. Both of those fan bases have a long, well documented, history of being let down. Historical collapses, and amazing series of events that would torture them in a way that George Bush would be proud.
But that was their shtick. Other sports fans kind of felt sorry for them, but we also thought that they enjoyed it to some extent. They were the Rodney Dangerfield’s of sports. Bad luck, curses, the cosmos or whatever caused it all were their identifying features. Much like Jay Leno and his nose, Courtney Love and her tracks, or Donald Trump and his hair. It’s never flattering, but necessary.
They’ll probably be offended by this, being that it’s just once for us Met fans. But I have caught a glimpse of their hell. For the past two weeks, watching ESPN.com box scores every night has been like alternating between being punched in the stomach and kicked in the jewels. Blown leads, come backs that fell just short, fielding that resembles Little League, and a bullpen that has been as dependable as Britney’s parenting skills.
The details and stats behind the collapse of my Mets aren’t important here. Baseball fans know it, and I just can’t stomach explaining just how bad this is. The good news, if you can call it that, is t he season isn’t over and they still have a chance to make the playoffs. If that happens, I’ll be ecstatic, but unless they have a pill for it, I can’t get my hopes up.
But that was their shtick. Other sports fans kind of felt sorry for them, but we also thought that they enjoyed it to some extent. They were the Rodney Dangerfield’s of sports. Bad luck, curses, the cosmos or whatever caused it all were their identifying features. Much like Jay Leno and his nose, Courtney Love and her tracks, or Donald Trump and his hair. It’s never flattering, but necessary.
They’ll probably be offended by this, being that it’s just once for us Met fans. But I have caught a glimpse of their hell. For the past two weeks, watching ESPN.com box scores every night has been like alternating between being punched in the stomach and kicked in the jewels. Blown leads, come backs that fell just short, fielding that resembles Little League, and a bullpen that has been as dependable as Britney’s parenting skills.
The details and stats behind the collapse of my Mets aren’t important here. Baseball fans know it, and I just can’t stomach explaining just how bad this is. The good news, if you can call it that, is t he season isn’t over and they still have a chance to make the playoffs. If that happens, I’ll be ecstatic, but unless they have a pill for it, I can’t get my hopes up.
September 27, 2007
Oh-No Shows
Spin-offs are a bad idea. They just don’t work. I understand why the big wigs think they’ll work; they’re taking a well received show and trying to double down. But they’re doubling down with a 12 and the dealer is showing an ace. Last night we watched “Private Practice,” the spin-off of “Grey’s” with the impressive cast. But putting together a show that has familiar and well liked actors raises expectations but has a horrible track record. I can only think of one current popular show that started off with well known actors, and that’s “Desperate Housewives.”
As for “Private Practice,” the writing was awful and the acting sub-par. I’ve admitted it, I like “Grey’s” and in addition, I’ve liked Taye Diggs since Go and Amy Brenneman since Heat. But this show felt totally forced. So they have this nice little private practice in LA, and these young good looking Doctors make tons of cake. We soon find out that they do this in spite of hardly seeing patients.
Our main character, Addison, the world class neonatal surgeon from Seattle just took this job without knowing minor details such as what kind of staff she’d have and what exactly she’ll be doing. Suddenly she has her one patient, a teenger who hid her pregnancy from pops, has gone in labor. Instead of taking her to a hospital, I guess dad took a minute to look in the yellow pages for private birthing centers. Never mind that they didn’t have a doctor in that department till this very day. Of course there are complications with the delivery, and this office isn’t set up for Addison to perform a C-section. They call an ambulance, which we’re told will take 10-20 minutes. In this meantime, she figures that the baby and mother wont survive that long unless she “MacGyver’s” it and performs surgery right there.
They sterilize the room, get everyone in scrubs, find surgical tools they didn’t have and prep for surgery in what must have been 8-16 minutes. Because they’ve started before the ambulance has arrived. Of course they perform the miracle. Oh, did I mention they didn’t put her under? No, they had a Doctor who practices alternative medicine work on the patient so she wouldn’t feel any pain. Whew, dodged a bullet there.
This private practice also employs a shrink. She gets a call that one of her patience has gone off the reservation and is in a store counting tile. So she rushes to the scene, along with the practice’s pediatrician to save the day. They figure out why she’s lost it, I guess she didn’t mention her dead son in any of her sessions. Best of all they some how find this out from some medical files, that I think they found in the managers office.
Best of all was the final scene, where the partners all meet to express their frustration with a colleague for not talking with them before hiring a new doctor. This ends with Addison telling them how bad of a day she’s had, how she saved their asses and she isn’t going anywhere. I think she’s trying to tell the audience she’s here to stay. Um, she’ll be lucky to last as long as “Joey.”
Following “Private Practice” was the premiere of “Dirty Sexy Money” which comes with a sort of all-star cast. Peter Krause, fantastic in “Sports Night” and I hear “Six Feet Under” heads a cast with Donald Sutherland, William (I think) Baldwin and some faces you’ll recognize even if you don’t know the names. Sutherland’s family is obviously inspired by the Hilton family, and Krause’s father was the family lawyer. He has suddenly passed away in a plane crash, which seems to have little impact on Krause. Not till the end when he finds out it might have been murder.
I guess the impressive, which is the wrong word for it, aspect of the show is how well it replicates our feelings for the Hiltons and Trumps of the world. We know we’re watching complete crap, but we’re still intrigued just enough to wonder what will happen next.
I am predicting this television season as the year of the jumping of the shark. “House” “My Name is Earl” “Grey’s” and “24” will all at the very least, take small jumps and maybe giant leaps.
As for “Private Practice,” the writing was awful and the acting sub-par. I’ve admitted it, I like “Grey’s” and in addition, I’ve liked Taye Diggs since Go and Amy Brenneman since Heat. But this show felt totally forced. So they have this nice little private practice in LA, and these young good looking Doctors make tons of cake. We soon find out that they do this in spite of hardly seeing patients.
Our main character, Addison, the world class neonatal surgeon from Seattle just took this job without knowing minor details such as what kind of staff she’d have and what exactly she’ll be doing. Suddenly she has her one patient, a teenger who hid her pregnancy from pops, has gone in labor. Instead of taking her to a hospital, I guess dad took a minute to look in the yellow pages for private birthing centers. Never mind that they didn’t have a doctor in that department till this very day. Of course there are complications with the delivery, and this office isn’t set up for Addison to perform a C-section. They call an ambulance, which we’re told will take 10-20 minutes. In this meantime, she figures that the baby and mother wont survive that long unless she “MacGyver’s” it and performs surgery right there.
They sterilize the room, get everyone in scrubs, find surgical tools they didn’t have and prep for surgery in what must have been 8-16 minutes. Because they’ve started before the ambulance has arrived. Of course they perform the miracle. Oh, did I mention they didn’t put her under? No, they had a Doctor who practices alternative medicine work on the patient so she wouldn’t feel any pain. Whew, dodged a bullet there.
This private practice also employs a shrink. She gets a call that one of her patience has gone off the reservation and is in a store counting tile. So she rushes to the scene, along with the practice’s pediatrician to save the day. They figure out why she’s lost it, I guess she didn’t mention her dead son in any of her sessions. Best of all they some how find this out from some medical files, that I think they found in the managers office.
Best of all was the final scene, where the partners all meet to express their frustration with a colleague for not talking with them before hiring a new doctor. This ends with Addison telling them how bad of a day she’s had, how she saved their asses and she isn’t going anywhere. I think she’s trying to tell the audience she’s here to stay. Um, she’ll be lucky to last as long as “Joey.”
Following “Private Practice” was the premiere of “Dirty Sexy Money” which comes with a sort of all-star cast. Peter Krause, fantastic in “Sports Night” and I hear “Six Feet Under” heads a cast with Donald Sutherland, William (I think) Baldwin and some faces you’ll recognize even if you don’t know the names. Sutherland’s family is obviously inspired by the Hilton family, and Krause’s father was the family lawyer. He has suddenly passed away in a plane crash, which seems to have little impact on Krause. Not till the end when he finds out it might have been murder.
I guess the impressive, which is the wrong word for it, aspect of the show is how well it replicates our feelings for the Hiltons and Trumps of the world. We know we’re watching complete crap, but we’re still intrigued just enough to wonder what will happen next.
I am predicting this television season as the year of the jumping of the shark. “House” “My Name is Earl” “Grey’s” and “24” will all at the very least, take small jumps and maybe giant leaps.
September 26, 2007
Two Things..
I’m not entirely sure of how it happened, but in the past few days I have received two text messages that weren’t intended for me. Not from friends who accidentally clicked on the wrong contact, but completely random. The first was the sort of text that could cause a lot of trouble for a fella.
Saturday afternoon I’m sitting at Long Branch enjoying the best burger in KC with my girlfriend and a good friend, when the text came in. “I love u more than you like me,” it read. Um, excuse me? The area code was 618, which I later found out belongs to someone in Southern Illinois. Getting random texts could rattle a lesser woman, and a text declaring their love for me isn’t doing me any favors. Seriously, the only reaction I could have would be the same no matter if I knew who it was or if I didn’t. Pointing this fact out is probably not my best idea. My friend decided to call the number to see who it was; she said it sounded like a 13 year old girl. This either makes me look even worse, or makes it all a funny case of happenstance. I’m thankful it was the second one. I gotta think that if the girlfriend thought I was texting young girls across state lines, she’d drop me faster than Chris Hansen could appear.
The second mis-text came yesterday. “How are we paying for pizza,” it read. This one came from a KC area code, and it referenced pizza. So it at least sounds like it was for the right guy. But the number was as foreign to me as panties are to Britney. I responded with, “who is we and why are we buying a pizza?” Only to be asked who I was. Beg your pardon, you sent me a text. Who are you, and I’m suddenly hungry. Oh, by the way. What the hell is up with “beg your pardon”? If we’re being all polite, is there really any need for someone to beg? Anyway, turns out it was some guy named Josh and he wasn’t exactly sure how I ended up getting his text. Buying pizza with strange guys could also send the girlfriend running.
--------------------------------------------------------
I don’t like Bill O’Reilly. I really don’t like him. I think he’s dangerous, arrogant, ignorant, racist, and any other adjectives that point to him being a mean and bad person. And I just read some comments he made about a restaurant in Harlem, and I can’t for the life me understand why he still has a job.
"I couldn't get over the fact that there was no difference between Sylvia's restaurant and any other restaurant in New York City. I mean, it was exactly the same, even though it's run by blacks, primarily black patronship." Later, during a discussion with National Public Radio senior correspondent and Fox News contributor Juan Williams about the effect of rap on culture, O'Reilly asserted: "There wasn't one person in Sylvia's who was screaming, 'M-Fer, I want more iced tea.' You know, I mean, everybody was -- it was like going into an Italian restaurant in an all-white suburb in the sense of people were sitting there, and they were ordering and having fun. And there wasn't any kind of craziness at all."
http://mediamatters.org/items/200709210007
Sorry, but are you M-Fing kidding me? When I’ve eaten at Cracker Barrel, I didn’t find it surprising that there aren’t minutes from the last Klans meeting hanging up. I’ve bee in a few deli’s, never heard anyone talking about controlling the media and the free world. Never once has the clerk at 7-11 referred to me as an infidel. What the hell is wrong with Bill O’Reilly and more importantly, what the hell is wrong with this country that he’s actually popular? But we’re afraid of the President of Iran and what hateful things he might say? At least that forum allowed for people to debate his comments, ever see O’Reilly react to someone calling him out? I’ve seen five year olds handle bedtime without dessert more maturely.
I love that he thinks “Black Americans are thinking more for themselves.” His entire career is based on him telling people how to think. If we don’t think like him, we’re wrong.
Also, if you listen to the clip on the side you’ll hear Juan Williams talking about the impact of rap music. He says rap music makes women think they need to dance around half naked, and that it tells kids this is the life style they need to live to get rich and famous. That’s rap music. What about rock music? Look through its history. Jerry Lee Lewis marries a kid. Elvis enjoyed his drugs. The Beatles, well they might have used some drugs. And rock music today? Their videos are what, high class? But anything rap does is vile.
Martin Scoresese is rightfully looked at as a genius, yet we’ve seen minors in intimate situations. We’ve seen crime glorified, and applauded it for being realistic. As I said in a previous post, Harry Connick Jr was once arrested for gun possession. There’s a video on YouTube of another nut job, Ted Nugent, waving guns around and making what can only be interpted as threats to Presidential Candidates Clinton and Obama. But if a rapper makes reference to similar activities, its vile and dangerous.
Look up hypocrite in the dictionary, and know what you’ll find? No, not a picture of Bill O’Reilly, but the definition of hypocrite which he obviously fucking is.
Saturday afternoon I’m sitting at Long Branch enjoying the best burger in KC with my girlfriend and a good friend, when the text came in. “I love u more than you like me,” it read. Um, excuse me? The area code was 618, which I later found out belongs to someone in Southern Illinois. Getting random texts could rattle a lesser woman, and a text declaring their love for me isn’t doing me any favors. Seriously, the only reaction I could have would be the same no matter if I knew who it was or if I didn’t. Pointing this fact out is probably not my best idea. My friend decided to call the number to see who it was; she said it sounded like a 13 year old girl. This either makes me look even worse, or makes it all a funny case of happenstance. I’m thankful it was the second one. I gotta think that if the girlfriend thought I was texting young girls across state lines, she’d drop me faster than Chris Hansen could appear.
The second mis-text came yesterday. “How are we paying for pizza,” it read. This one came from a KC area code, and it referenced pizza. So it at least sounds like it was for the right guy. But the number was as foreign to me as panties are to Britney. I responded with, “who is we and why are we buying a pizza?” Only to be asked who I was. Beg your pardon, you sent me a text. Who are you, and I’m suddenly hungry. Oh, by the way. What the hell is up with “beg your pardon”? If we’re being all polite, is there really any need for someone to beg? Anyway, turns out it was some guy named Josh and he wasn’t exactly sure how I ended up getting his text. Buying pizza with strange guys could also send the girlfriend running.
--------------------------------------------------------
I don’t like Bill O’Reilly. I really don’t like him. I think he’s dangerous, arrogant, ignorant, racist, and any other adjectives that point to him being a mean and bad person. And I just read some comments he made about a restaurant in Harlem, and I can’t for the life me understand why he still has a job.
"I couldn't get over the fact that there was no difference between Sylvia's restaurant and any other restaurant in New York City. I mean, it was exactly the same, even though it's run by blacks, primarily black patronship." Later, during a discussion with National Public Radio senior correspondent and Fox News contributor Juan Williams about the effect of rap on culture, O'Reilly asserted: "There wasn't one person in Sylvia's who was screaming, 'M-Fer, I want more iced tea.' You know, I mean, everybody was -- it was like going into an Italian restaurant in an all-white suburb in the sense of people were sitting there, and they were ordering and having fun. And there wasn't any kind of craziness at all."
http://mediamatters.org/items/200709210007
Sorry, but are you M-Fing kidding me? When I’ve eaten at Cracker Barrel, I didn’t find it surprising that there aren’t minutes from the last Klans meeting hanging up. I’ve bee in a few deli’s, never heard anyone talking about controlling the media and the free world. Never once has the clerk at 7-11 referred to me as an infidel. What the hell is wrong with Bill O’Reilly and more importantly, what the hell is wrong with this country that he’s actually popular? But we’re afraid of the President of Iran and what hateful things he might say? At least that forum allowed for people to debate his comments, ever see O’Reilly react to someone calling him out? I’ve seen five year olds handle bedtime without dessert more maturely.
I love that he thinks “Black Americans are thinking more for themselves.” His entire career is based on him telling people how to think. If we don’t think like him, we’re wrong.
Also, if you listen to the clip on the side you’ll hear Juan Williams talking about the impact of rap music. He says rap music makes women think they need to dance around half naked, and that it tells kids this is the life style they need to live to get rich and famous. That’s rap music. What about rock music? Look through its history. Jerry Lee Lewis marries a kid. Elvis enjoyed his drugs. The Beatles, well they might have used some drugs. And rock music today? Their videos are what, high class? But anything rap does is vile.
Martin Scoresese is rightfully looked at as a genius, yet we’ve seen minors in intimate situations. We’ve seen crime glorified, and applauded it for being realistic. As I said in a previous post, Harry Connick Jr was once arrested for gun possession. There’s a video on YouTube of another nut job, Ted Nugent, waving guns around and making what can only be interpted as threats to Presidential Candidates Clinton and Obama. But if a rapper makes reference to similar activities, its vile and dangerous.
Look up hypocrite in the dictionary, and know what you’ll find? No, not a picture of Bill O’Reilly, but the definition of hypocrite which he obviously fucking is.
September 25, 2007
Hirp On...
It seemed as if everyone was all bent out of shape because Columbia University gave the head dick or Iran a forum to speak. I really don’t understand why. Seems like we like to sit on the other side of the planet, waving our collective finger at how other countries operate, and preach about how great our freedoms are. Then when given the opportunity to show them first hand how great something like the freedom of speech is, everyone gets their panties in a bunch.
It’s not as if I agree with anything the nut job says, but instead of reading about how nuts he is or dangerous we were given the opportunity to hear it right from the lunatics’ mouth. Are we afraid people will buy into his non-sense? If so, we have bigger fish to fry. It’s pretty simple really, think about parenting. Would you tell your kids to listen to their enemy or tell them to take their ball and go home?
I think Barrak Obama hit one out of the park when he quoted JFK, “Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate.”
I’ll be honest, I may not be the good practicing Jew I should be, but I still have more than a slight problem with someone wanting to eliminate Israel and kill some Jews. As a rule, I’m pretty much against killing any group of people. Even if there was a race, creed or religion that preached the gospel of mullets, Zubaz, Nascar, eating healthy, reality TV, the use of aluminum bats and cell phone belt clips.
However, I glad that they wouldn’t allow him to visit Ground Zero. That would have been like OJ showing up at Ron Goldman’s wake.
It’s not as if I agree with anything the nut job says, but instead of reading about how nuts he is or dangerous we were given the opportunity to hear it right from the lunatics’ mouth. Are we afraid people will buy into his non-sense? If so, we have bigger fish to fry. It’s pretty simple really, think about parenting. Would you tell your kids to listen to their enemy or tell them to take their ball and go home?
I think Barrak Obama hit one out of the park when he quoted JFK, “Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate.”
I’ll be honest, I may not be the good practicing Jew I should be, but I still have more than a slight problem with someone wanting to eliminate Israel and kill some Jews. As a rule, I’m pretty much against killing any group of people. Even if there was a race, creed or religion that preached the gospel of mullets, Zubaz, Nascar, eating healthy, reality TV, the use of aluminum bats and cell phone belt clips.
However, I glad that they wouldn’t allow him to visit Ground Zero. That would have been like OJ showing up at Ron Goldman’s wake.
September 18, 2007
Juicy Squirts
Has there ever been such a wide spread case of de ja vu? OJ might actually have his second trial of the century, and in a different century from his first.
• Think Michael Vick is wishing OJ did this a few months ago?
• The original OJ case made more careers than the Concord Institute and Brown Mackey combined. Greta Van Facelift, Faye Resnick (did you know she’s Godmother to Paris and Nicky Hilton), Kato Kaelin (who paved the way for celebs with no actual talent) and Mark Fuhrman (who pretty much blew the case, then profited from the it.) That’s just to name a few. CourTV became huge after this case, who knows if it would have even lasted had there never been any OJ.
• Did OJ’s golfing buddies look at this as a great career opportunity? Someone brought a recording device along for the ride. Pretty sure rule #1, in the Crime for Dummies book, suggests leaving camcorders and other recording devices at home.
• Where was AC Cowlings? Shouldn’t he be on the tape? “You know who I am, I’m AC!”
• Why is Larry King asking Ron Goldman’s sister if she thinks this arrest will help boost sales numbers for OJ’s book?
• Will OJ be writing a follow-up book?
• When arrested while staying in a hotel, do they charge you an early check-out fee? Do they even check you out?
• Did OJ really think these guys would steal his stuff and try to profit off him, but not tell anyone when he barged in and stuck them up? How did someone so stupid get away with such a huge crime?
• Think Michael Vick is wishing OJ did this a few months ago?
• The original OJ case made more careers than the Concord Institute and Brown Mackey combined. Greta Van Facelift, Faye Resnick (did you know she’s Godmother to Paris and Nicky Hilton), Kato Kaelin (who paved the way for celebs with no actual talent) and Mark Fuhrman (who pretty much blew the case, then profited from the it.) That’s just to name a few. CourTV became huge after this case, who knows if it would have even lasted had there never been any OJ.
• Did OJ’s golfing buddies look at this as a great career opportunity? Someone brought a recording device along for the ride. Pretty sure rule #1, in the Crime for Dummies book, suggests leaving camcorders and other recording devices at home.
• Where was AC Cowlings? Shouldn’t he be on the tape? “You know who I am, I’m AC!”
• Why is Larry King asking Ron Goldman’s sister if she thinks this arrest will help boost sales numbers for OJ’s book?
• Will OJ be writing a follow-up book?
• When arrested while staying in a hotel, do they charge you an early check-out fee? Do they even check you out?
• Did OJ really think these guys would steal his stuff and try to profit off him, but not tell anyone when he barged in and stuck them up? How did someone so stupid get away with such a huge crime?
September 14, 2007
Amen
This whole thing with Kathy Griffin and her “offensive” remarks has been blown out of proportion, which isn’t a surprise in the least. I’ve thought about the whole mess, and how religion and religious people have gotten it all wrong. Then I realized, the blue print for religion is all around us. It’s pretty simple too, the answer is in sports and sport fans.
Yankee fans, Met fans, Royal fans, Brewer fans and Marlin fans are, in theory, on the right track. They can disagree about which teams to cheer for, and have different reasons for picking those teams. Reasons that often mirror why people belong to a particular relgion, the most common being “I was raised a ____ fan,” or “that’s who I grew up loving.” Just as we belong to one sect or another mostly because of how we were raised. But fans of different teams can disagree on who to root for, can dislike the other team, but the common ground is the game.
If the religions of the world could only grasp this concept, and then substitute Yankees for Wicca’s, Mets for Judaism, Royals for Hindu, Cubs for Muslims, and the game for God. The teams can be different, but the game is the same. Even when you separate the sports, football from baseball or basketball. It’s still competition at the core that draws us in. You can have a stadium full of 100,000 people cheering for different sides, but at the heart of it all they are there to enjoy camaraderie, and connect to something bigger than themselves.
At times it goes to far, but not as often as it does with religion. There was a story about some Oklahoma fan grabbing the sack of a Texas fan in a bar. But that’s difference between a fan and a fantatic. Just as there are Christians, and fanatical Christians that bomb clinics and there are Muslims and assholes that fly planes into buildings.
But for the most part, a Yankee fan and Red Sox can make fun of each other and rip on the other team and it’s just in fun. It doesn’t lead to wars. If religions could just adopt this line of thinking, the world would be such a better place. Then again, the world would be a better place without the Yankees.
Yankee fans, Met fans, Royal fans, Brewer fans and Marlin fans are, in theory, on the right track. They can disagree about which teams to cheer for, and have different reasons for picking those teams. Reasons that often mirror why people belong to a particular relgion, the most common being “I was raised a ____ fan,” or “that’s who I grew up loving.” Just as we belong to one sect or another mostly because of how we were raised. But fans of different teams can disagree on who to root for, can dislike the other team, but the common ground is the game.
If the religions of the world could only grasp this concept, and then substitute Yankees for Wicca’s, Mets for Judaism, Royals for Hindu, Cubs for Muslims, and the game for God. The teams can be different, but the game is the same. Even when you separate the sports, football from baseball or basketball. It’s still competition at the core that draws us in. You can have a stadium full of 100,000 people cheering for different sides, but at the heart of it all they are there to enjoy camaraderie, and connect to something bigger than themselves.
At times it goes to far, but not as often as it does with religion. There was a story about some Oklahoma fan grabbing the sack of a Texas fan in a bar. But that’s difference between a fan and a fantatic. Just as there are Christians, and fanatical Christians that bomb clinics and there are Muslims and assholes that fly planes into buildings.
But for the most part, a Yankee fan and Red Sox can make fun of each other and rip on the other team and it’s just in fun. It doesn’t lead to wars. If religions could just adopt this line of thinking, the world would be such a better place. Then again, the world would be a better place without the Yankees.
September 12, 2007
Lost Night
I don’t know what the deal is. First, a few months ago, I lost my favorite pair of sunglasses. Happens to everyone, I know this, but I had those bad boys for a solid five year run. It’s one thing to lose them after six months, you almost expect that. But once you make it over two years, you start thinking you’ll have them till you toss ‘em. Then I went to Dallas, and now I no longer have them. And then I some how miss place a coin I kept from my stay at Mandalay Bay. It wasn’t worth much, just a dollar in fact. And even though I won the last poker tournament in which I used it as a card guard, it wasn’t really good luck. But it grew legs and disappeared. And last night I lost both some cash and a money clip I’ve had for four years. The clip actually has some sentimental value, as I got it for being in a friends wedding. It also had some financial value, as it’s from Tiffany and Co., which makes it something I’d probably never buy myself.
I’m pretty sure it jumped out of my pocket while I was in Target last night picking up the new Kanye West CD. Damn you Kanye, you owe me! I’ll call later on and see if anyone turned it in, with the hopes that they just kept the cash and felt bad about someone losing such a nice money clip. I think that’s what they call, “a long shot.” I looked in my car, under the seat, between the seat and console, in the storage compartment on my door, back under my seat. All I found was 60 cents, some gum wrappers, and a few fries. Now I keep going back and forth in my head, kicking myself for losing the clip and then kicking myself for losing the cash. Oh, and let me also mention that when I tried to use my ATM card I received a message that my card had been reported lost or stolen. Not sure who reported my card lost or stolen, because I didn’t lose it and it wasn’t stolen. So that was nice.
To add insult to injury, the whole reason I was even out of the house last night was to see a movie. And it sucked, and I mean like a Hoover. Shoot ‘Em Up is one big mistake, with a bunch of smaller mistakes sprinkled on top. The fact that Clive Owen and Paul Giamatti both signed on for this piece of garbage makes me wonder if someone has video of those two in very compromising positions. Owen was great in Sin City, and tries to play the same character here, only minus anything resembling a plot and void of interesting dialogue. Pretty much void of any dialogue at all. I think they tried to make him funny, but John McClane wouldn’t say the utter crap his Mr. Smith says. Yes, his name really is Mr. Smith in this movie. We have a Mr. Smith, and he spends most of the movie being chased by an army of men, and he easily kills them all while chomping on a carrot, and occasionally uses the vegetable (it is, right?) to kill.
Okay, time for an update. I know that doesn’t make much sense since this hasn’t been posted yet, but whatever. I just called Target, and someone turned in money clip AND my money. Can you believe that? Not much surprises me, but this sure as hell does.
I’m pretty sure it jumped out of my pocket while I was in Target last night picking up the new Kanye West CD. Damn you Kanye, you owe me! I’ll call later on and see if anyone turned it in, with the hopes that they just kept the cash and felt bad about someone losing such a nice money clip. I think that’s what they call, “a long shot.” I looked in my car, under the seat, between the seat and console, in the storage compartment on my door, back under my seat. All I found was 60 cents, some gum wrappers, and a few fries. Now I keep going back and forth in my head, kicking myself for losing the clip and then kicking myself for losing the cash. Oh, and let me also mention that when I tried to use my ATM card I received a message that my card had been reported lost or stolen. Not sure who reported my card lost or stolen, because I didn’t lose it and it wasn’t stolen. So that was nice.
To add insult to injury, the whole reason I was even out of the house last night was to see a movie. And it sucked, and I mean like a Hoover. Shoot ‘Em Up is one big mistake, with a bunch of smaller mistakes sprinkled on top. The fact that Clive Owen and Paul Giamatti both signed on for this piece of garbage makes me wonder if someone has video of those two in very compromising positions. Owen was great in Sin City, and tries to play the same character here, only minus anything resembling a plot and void of interesting dialogue. Pretty much void of any dialogue at all. I think they tried to make him funny, but John McClane wouldn’t say the utter crap his Mr. Smith says. Yes, his name really is Mr. Smith in this movie. We have a Mr. Smith, and he spends most of the movie being chased by an army of men, and he easily kills them all while chomping on a carrot, and occasionally uses the vegetable (it is, right?) to kill.
Okay, time for an update. I know that doesn’t make much sense since this hasn’t been posted yet, but whatever. I just called Target, and someone turned in money clip AND my money. Can you believe that? Not much surprises me, but this sure as hell does.
September 10, 2007
Hirplings
• I love music, but I’m really not a huge fan of concerts. One thing I don’t understand is the encore. The artist ends their set and the audience cheers and cheers, making them come back out to perform some more. Why? Why can’t they just sing all the songs they planned on, and the show ends when they say? It’s not as genuine as we like to think. The artist and often the audience know exactly what song or songs will be played. But we should believe they are truly humbled and grateful? It’s complete bullshit. “No, you’re too kind. Really, thank you. I mean it. No, I can’t. I have to go. One more? Okay, I guess we can do just one more.” Sounds like a car salesmen telling us they can’t go any lower, then giving up and marching to their manager who never lowers the price only to find out he got laid last night so he’s in a good mood and will make this one time exception. Carmax should manage concerts.
• Sprint is pretty happy to have “High School Musical 2” available on Sprint TV. Wonder if they realize more people are viewing naked pictures of Vanessa Hudgens. That should be their big promotion this week. I swear, after I watched that movie, I was going to write about the future of the cast and who would be the first to end up naked on the net and who would be first in rehab. 10 years ago the cast would have been Britney, Christina, Jessica, Justin and the rest of the Backstreet Boys and N’Sync.
• http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070909/ap_on_fe_st/odd_salty_burger I don’t know, call me crazy, but this sounds like a slight abuse of power. Cop eats a burger and gets sick, turns out there was too much salt on the burger, so he halls the grill chick off to jail. Someone let him do this? I wonder what will be in his next burger.
• Like most of America, I had to watch Britney perform at the MTV VMA’s. Let’s see, she looked bad, sounded horrible, the song sucks, she was dressed like a stripper but didn’t dance, she couldn’t lip sync even a little bit and the crowd looked both bored and sad. Britney, your clock is ticking. 14 minutes, 32 seconds. 14 minutes 38 seconds…..
• There’s a new show on HBO, “Tell Me You Love Me.” Pretty good show, feels a bit like you’re watching real life un-happily married couples. “It’s not TV, it’s HBO,” is no longer an appropriate slogan. Not after seeing the following: balls, dude jerkin the gerkin, hand job with the Creamy Italian and geriatric fellatio. Rhythm
• Sprint is pretty happy to have “High School Musical 2” available on Sprint TV. Wonder if they realize more people are viewing naked pictures of Vanessa Hudgens. That should be their big promotion this week. I swear, after I watched that movie, I was going to write about the future of the cast and who would be the first to end up naked on the net and who would be first in rehab. 10 years ago the cast would have been Britney, Christina, Jessica, Justin and the rest of the Backstreet Boys and N’Sync.
• http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070909/ap_on_fe_st/odd_salty_burger I don’t know, call me crazy, but this sounds like a slight abuse of power. Cop eats a burger and gets sick, turns out there was too much salt on the burger, so he halls the grill chick off to jail. Someone let him do this? I wonder what will be in his next burger.
• Like most of America, I had to watch Britney perform at the MTV VMA’s. Let’s see, she looked bad, sounded horrible, the song sucks, she was dressed like a stripper but didn’t dance, she couldn’t lip sync even a little bit and the crowd looked both bored and sad. Britney, your clock is ticking. 14 minutes, 32 seconds. 14 minutes 38 seconds…..
• There’s a new show on HBO, “Tell Me You Love Me.” Pretty good show, feels a bit like you’re watching real life un-happily married couples. “It’s not TV, it’s HBO,” is no longer an appropriate slogan. Not after seeing the following: balls, dude jerkin the gerkin, hand job with the Creamy Italian and geriatric fellatio. Rhythm
September 07, 2007
Oy
Well, another day and another scandal. The landscape of sports has been forever changed, and in all likeliness it changed long ago. We’re just now getting the memo. One of the greatest stories in baseball this year has been the resurrection and reinvention of Rick Ankiel and his career. His troubles with throwing a strike are well documented and his inspiring return to the show as a slugging outfielder is the stuff movies are made of. Good sports movies like The Natural, Rudy and Rocky too.
But now his name has been linked to HGH, and the court of public opinion long ago discarded due process, which means any accusations have some merit. Unless you’re Lance Armstrong and it’s the French making the accusations. So this triumphant return is starting to feel dirty. It really doesn’t even matter at this point if he did or didn’t take something. The damage is done. We’ll always wonder, not just about him, but everyone else. The other feel good story this year in baseball, has been Josh Hamilton. He’s a guy who was a #1 draft pick, but his career was derailed by drug use before ever making it to the Major Leagues. He got clean, was given a second chance, and made good on it. Another storybook story, the kind we like to feel is a testament to the “American way of life.”
But given the current state of sports, we’d be fools to not at least consider how he made it back. I like the story, and want to believe in its innocence and integrity. Only mama didn’t raise no fool. We’re talking about a guy who took drugs, and those drugs were behind his fall to begin with. It’s not out of the realm of possibility that he began using some other drugs to return to the game and chase his dream. And even if he did, it’s still a powerful story. It’s still a guy who lost everything and found a way to get it all back. We’re idiots to assume our hero’s play by the rules. We like to think they do, and that’s what makes them different from us. But how many people, especially successful ones, always play nice? The guy at work that gets along with every one isn’t usually the boss.
Maybe it’s time we stop being naïve, and just appreciate them for how far they can hit a ball or how fast they can run. Superman may have done it naturally, but that’s because he was playing in a world that wasn’t his. Spiderman’s webs weren’t the result of hard work and Jenna Jameson is working with a body science gave her. If you believe in Jesus, it isn’t like he was playing on the same field as everyone else. I’m sure its real tough to be a great leader when your dad is actually God. Our heroes have never been like us. I could dose myself with HGH for the next 5 years, and I still wouldn’t be able to hit a curveball.
All that aside, it still sucks. I hate hearing a story about someone or seeing an athlete accomplish something great, only to later realize there’s more to the story. I don’t know if we should just blame them, since they are responsible for their own actions. Or perhaps we should blame the media. I also don’t know what’s worse, knowing when something isn’t kosher or all the times we didn’t know something wasn’t kosher. So maybe it’s our fault, we put our own expectations on these guys and we decide what they and their actions mean to us.
But now his name has been linked to HGH, and the court of public opinion long ago discarded due process, which means any accusations have some merit. Unless you’re Lance Armstrong and it’s the French making the accusations. So this triumphant return is starting to feel dirty. It really doesn’t even matter at this point if he did or didn’t take something. The damage is done. We’ll always wonder, not just about him, but everyone else. The other feel good story this year in baseball, has been Josh Hamilton. He’s a guy who was a #1 draft pick, but his career was derailed by drug use before ever making it to the Major Leagues. He got clean, was given a second chance, and made good on it. Another storybook story, the kind we like to feel is a testament to the “American way of life.”
But given the current state of sports, we’d be fools to not at least consider how he made it back. I like the story, and want to believe in its innocence and integrity. Only mama didn’t raise no fool. We’re talking about a guy who took drugs, and those drugs were behind his fall to begin with. It’s not out of the realm of possibility that he began using some other drugs to return to the game and chase his dream. And even if he did, it’s still a powerful story. It’s still a guy who lost everything and found a way to get it all back. We’re idiots to assume our hero’s play by the rules. We like to think they do, and that’s what makes them different from us. But how many people, especially successful ones, always play nice? The guy at work that gets along with every one isn’t usually the boss.
Maybe it’s time we stop being naïve, and just appreciate them for how far they can hit a ball or how fast they can run. Superman may have done it naturally, but that’s because he was playing in a world that wasn’t his. Spiderman’s webs weren’t the result of hard work and Jenna Jameson is working with a body science gave her. If you believe in Jesus, it isn’t like he was playing on the same field as everyone else. I’m sure its real tough to be a great leader when your dad is actually God. Our heroes have never been like us. I could dose myself with HGH for the next 5 years, and I still wouldn’t be able to hit a curveball.
All that aside, it still sucks. I hate hearing a story about someone or seeing an athlete accomplish something great, only to later realize there’s more to the story. I don’t know if we should just blame them, since they are responsible for their own actions. Or perhaps we should blame the media. I also don’t know what’s worse, knowing when something isn’t kosher or all the times we didn’t know something wasn’t kosher. So maybe it’s our fault, we put our own expectations on these guys and we decide what they and their actions mean to us.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)