Hirpancé

I haven’t posted in what seems like a month or so, sorry ‘bout that. I’ve been a tad bit busy, getting ready to move and all. Not just once, no, I can’t do anything that simple. First we’re moving my girlfriends place, and then the following week we’ll work on moving my stuff. And in the end, we’ll have our stuff. So yeah, I should warn you now. This post is going to have a lot of comments like that; the things that make you throw up just a little bit in your mouth. The type of comments that sound real cheesy, only they are completely sincere. You’ve been warned, and I don’t want to hear about it later.

This is going to be list of things I’ve noticed since getting engaged. As I said, I don’t want to hear about it.

• I still hate the word “fiancé” but sometimes it really just makes things easier. I came home the other day, this “home” technically being her place, and the buyer was there to do the inspection. They were in the basement, so I just wanted to let them know I was there so they wouldn’t freak out if they saw me on the couch. I said yadda yadda yadda, “this is my girlfriends place.” And I stumbled for a second, more than usual even, because I considered saying fiancé instead. It just sounded more formal and appropriate. Instead I sounded like a doofus leaching off of his girlfriend. And I’m a doofus for countless reasons, but not that.

• There’s really nothing cooler than catching a newly engaged woman constantly looking down at her finger and smiling. The fact she’s engaged to you is what really makes it amazing.

• I was used to being single, and content with it. Only having to think about myself was easy. Owning a home made more sense in the long run, but being single I didn’t really care. The easier way sounded better. Owning a home meant yard work, taxes, responsibility for every little thing and mainly it meant being an adult. I want a home now. I think about a backyard, room for toys, sleepovers and Saturday morning cartoons.

• I even want to start balancing my checkbook, something I haven’t done since Clintons first term. And I will, just as soon as we get a joint account. It’s too late at this point to even try with mine.

• I wasn’t a rat pack, but I collected things. Having all my CD’s, DVD’s and even VHS movies has always been important to me. Getting rid of any of them sounded like a horrible idea. Well, I just tossed the VHS tapes I had purchased DVD’s for and gave up on the idea that I needed to keep them. I sold some CD’s I haven’t listened to since the late 90s and decided if I ever wanted them back for the one or two songs I still like on each, I can just download them. Legally of course.

• I’m about to break some guy code here, but oh well. Going into my last poker game, I was expected to catch a fire storm of shit from the guys. God knows I’ve dished it out over the past three years with an uncountable amount of jokes about kids and marriage. But I pretty much only received was congratulations, and one guy telling me I should have talked to him before so he could talk me out of it. I don’t even know who he was. I even had the 5 year old daughter of our host come up and tap me on the arm and with a big toothless smile say, “congratulations!” Poker night isn’t supposed to have cute moments like that, but it did and it was the first thing I talked about after the game when I got home. Chicks love that shit, but so do we, only we just won’t admit it.

• Another thing about poker night. The drive home after a poor night at the table was always horrible. Reliving every mistake over and over lead to a sleep deprived night. Now there’s something to look forward to when I get home.

• Even my blog has changed. I swear I’m still the same cynical grumpy bastard deep down inside, still the same ol’ Hirp. I’m even looking forward to really getting into the planning of the wedding, because my fingers salivate at the promise of dealing with incompetent and moronic people in an industry I know nothing about.