Mike and 'Ye

Words often used to describe Michael Jordan: great, icon, unstoppable, focused, gravity defying, champion, clutch, phenomenal, and extraordinary and that’s just the very tip of the iceberg. After watching his Hall of Fame induction speech on DVR over the weekend, I have some new adjectives to describe the G.O.A.T (Greatest of All Time). These first come to mind: petty, small, insecure, immature, jackass, and damn near pathetic.

He started of talking about how we already know pretty much everything about him, and I get the feeling he was actually holding back from telling how what a nuisance all his fans have been. Then it becomes perfectly clear, why we never really saw Jordan being Jordan in all those years of being in the spotlight. He’s really a dick. Those of us, who followed his career, heard the stories of him punching out teammates. But that was just him being ultra-completive. Or so we thought. He’s not nearly as articulate or humble as he’s portrayed, and that’s the real reason he never spoke candidly the media, the way Shaq, Barkley or Magic did.

I watched John Stockton’s speech, and he spent his career trying to downplay how great he was, and he was self deprecating, funny, humble and thankful. David Robinson was totally awed by the induction, grateful and sincere. Jordan spent more time thanking those who he felt wronged him throughout his career, and rubbing their faces in the fact that he was better.

When Stockton and Robinson spoke to their children, you saw them as proud dads. Mike still made it about him. “I wouldn’t want to be you guys.” And after years wondering what it’d be like to have MJ as a parent, I can safely say that I wouldn’t want to be them either. And maybe this is me being, well me, and being a little too picky, I thought it was classless that Jordan sat next to his piece of arm candy, rather than his children. So now he’s divorced, which of course was done after he was out of the spotlight, and he has the right to date. But going into the Hall of Fame is supposed to be a pretty huge honor, and no one sacrificed more for his career than his kids. But he spent about 19 seconds on his kids, told them to look around, that the price of admission to the Hall of Fame inductions used to be $200 and was now $1,000 and had the gall to say, “but I paid it, I had no choice. I had a lot of family, a lot of friends I had to bring in. So thank you Hall of Fame for raising ticket prices, I guess. ”

Funny thing, to me anyway, is that for the first part of his career I really didn’t like him much. I was a Magic guy, and he was the best ever to me. That Jordan guy was exciting, but a ball hog. After he retired, the first time, I realized what we were missing. When he came back, I could finally admit to myself that he was the best, and it wasn’t even that close. After he came back the second time, well, I thought the same things that I think about Brett Favre now. Move on, dude. Now I realize that, after his second retirement, he should have stayed retired and just left the public arena.

Be like Mike? Nah, like Stockton did over and over again, I’ll pass.




Next target: Kanye West.

When dude came out in 2004, I thought he was a breath of fresh air. Exactly what both hip hop, and the music scene in general needed. After bling and cash had taken over hip hop like greed took over the 80’s, he rapped about Jesus, his mom and school. Then the ego landed. When he didn’t win awards he was nominated for, he acted like a brat. But last night, at the VMA’s he raised his game. When Taylor Swift won for best video, he actually got on stage, took the mic from her, and voiced his opinion that Beyonce had one of the best videos ever. What the hell?! Even B herself, couldn’t believe what was happening.

Now I know the VMA’s are a far cry from being the Oscars, but can you ever imagine seeing Sean Penn jumping on stage, and telling us how someone else should have won? I can’t think of a situation where anyone would do anything like this. Well, maybe Michael Jordan would want to.

He blogged his apology:

I’M SOOOOO SORRY TO TAYLOR SWIFT AND HER FANS AND HER MOM. I SPOKE TO HER MOTHER RIGHT AFTER AND SHE SAID THE SAME THING MY MOTHER WOULD’VE SAID. SHE IS VERY TALENTED! I LIKE THE LYRICS ABOUT BEING A CHEERLEADER AND SHE’S IN THE BLEACHERS! …………………… I’M IN THE WRONG FOR GOING ON STAGE AND TAKING AWAY FROM HER MOMENT!…………….. BEYONCE’S VIDEO WAS THE BEST OF THIS DECADE!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT MTV. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I’M A FAN OF REAL POP CULTURE!!! NO DISRESPECT BUT WE WATCHIN’ THE SHOW AT THE CRIB RIGHT NOW CAUSE … WELL YOU KNOW!!!! I’M STILL HAPPY FOR TAYLOR!!!! BOOOYAAAWWWW!!!! YOU ARE VERY VERY TALENTED!!! I GAVE MY AWARDS TO OUTKAST WHEN THEY DESERVED IT OVER ME… THAT’S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!! I’M NOT CRAZY YALL, I’M JUST REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!! I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR TAYLOR AND I’M SINCERELY SORRY!!! MUCH RESPECT!!!!!

And my response is this: first, lose the caps lock thing. What are you, 12? Second, in a decent apology, one that’s you know, sincere, one usually stops arguing how their opinion was right. Lastly, by saying “no disrespect” that doesn’t mean you can say “fuck you” and have it mean something else. Then he implies that she should give her award to Beyonce, because you supposedly gave yours to Outkast? Well you just gave Taylor Swift a few thousand of your fans too.