Truth

So driving into work today, I was listening to my show, Mike & Mike, and they were getting into a pretty heavy subject in the wake of Roger Clemens appearance in front on Congress. The heavy subject at hand, was should you lie for a friend.

Here’s the skinny, Clemens’ former teammate and supposed good friend, Andy Pettitte was also named in the Mitchell Report a couple months ago. The two used the same trainer, and while Clemens said it was completely untrue, in regards to the allegations against him, Pettitte came out and admitted that the allegations against him were in fact true. Interestingly enough, he first claimed to have used something at one point just a couple times, and then also acknowledged that his dad supplied him with HGH just once in 2004.

Pettitte also testified that he knew Roger used, based on some conversations they had, and that he had to tell the truth because one day he would have to answer to God. Love it when people do the right thing because of a fear or love for God, even though God didn’t prevent Andy from cheating in the first place. So now the debate is, should Andy have outted his friend or not. And Mike & Mike broke it down to the simple question, would you lie for a friend in that position. God damn, that’s good stuff right there.

Part of me likes to think, hell yes I would. Death before dishonor and all that. But wait a second, by doing so I’m setting myself up for a perjury charge, and if this is such a good friend, why would they allow me to do that? Especially when there’s a good chance that we’d both end up facing charges. Now Roger never came out and called Andy a liar, instead he said he “mis-remembered” conversations or didn’t recall them correctly. This makes Roger a giant pussy. Maybe he still wants to be buddies, and can’t stomach the idea of questioning the guys’ integrity in front of the world, but he did so with the words he chose anyway.

Look, we have all lied and we will all lie again. I was once told by a “friend” that he used hanging out with me as cover to his girlfriend, for a night he was, well not hanging out with me. I didn’t like it, and I told him not to do it again, and that if I was questioned I wouldn’t lie for him. But at the same time, it wasn’t the honest thing for me to keep that to myself. We’re no longer friends, and that situation helped set up the collapse of our friendship. But yeah, I lied there. And I’ve lied plenty of other times, usually to cover up for a friend or save myself some embarrassment. I’ve lied to my friends, bosses and parents. 99% of the time they’ve been white lies, but a lie is a lie.

But let’s be honest (ironic, right?), there is a certain amount of honor when you lie for a friend. “Did (blank) come in late?” “Nope, he was right on time.” Feels good, you covered for a buddy and hope he’d do the same. “No, it wasn’t a lame party at all, everyone had a great time.” Or “I swear dad, I’m working on cleaning up my credit.” Okay, no honor in the last one, that’s strictly for saving yourself from a lecture and a headache, as well as some shame. But we all do it.

But would I lie for a friend if I was in the same situation as Roger and Andy? Shit, that’s tough. I don’t think so. Not because I’d want to rat them out, or screw them over, but because I’d want to save my ass. And I’d be damn pissed if they continued to lie, because in doing so, they’re calling me a liar. And I went through a situation somewhat like that back in my LC days, although it wasn’t really a friend.

This chick forgot to lock the gate one night, and I opened the store the following day. Leaving the gate unlocked just happens to be a big no-no, go figure. So I mentioned it to someone, wondering if there was a legit reason. I didn’t go to the higher ups, because I wasn’t looking to get her in trouble. But the story made its way to the asshole in charge, and before long we’re sitting in his office explaining what happened. Her story went like this:

She had to borrow someone else’s keys because she forgot hers, but she locked up with them. She came in the next morning to leave the keys in the store, and she saw me in the back. This was pretty much in direct opposition of my side, which stated that I came in to work, and the gate was unlocked. In the office were the keys which were borrowed. So I said, that her story couldn’t be accurate. And she said I was mistaken, that she came in with to return the keys, and I was already there. I specifically recall her saying “I’m not saying Gregg’s lying, but he’s wrong.”

By her not owning up to it, she was calling me a liar and she didn’t even have the balls to use the word. Being that it wasn’t a friend of mine, I sure as hell wouldn’t lie to cover for her. Had it been a friend would I have lied? Yep, I’m pretty sure I would have. But if it got to the point t hat we were both under oath, and they were going to stand by their story? Well, I might and I might not continue on with the lie. Depends on how confident I am that courts know the truth, and also if that friend is willing to tell the truth if I tell the truth. If I’m confident we’re busted, and the friend won’t own up to it, well now they made it a “me or him” situation, and it’s going to be me. Not because I’m only out for myself, but because anyone who would throw me under the bus isn’t going to be my friend the next day anyway. That’s how I deal with ultimatums, whoever gives me one is out. If my girlfriend had said to me, “I don’t like this friend, it’s him or me.” Well, it would have been the friend. Just like if a friend had said that about her, he’d be 86’ed.

Loyal friends don’t make you choose. So Andy, I said fuck Roger. Besides, Clemens has always been an asshole.