Jsteat

So I just took a pretty big step. I didn’t call Charter House, close though. I made an appointment to talk to someone about this eating disorder thing I have. I’m sure this thrills everyone in the medical profession, but I kinda-sorta self-diagnosed myself with the help of Google. “Selective Eating Disorder”, so I have ADD and SED. As if I wasn’t sick enough of acronyms from work.

The British Journal of Clinical Child Psychology and Psychiatry states that:

Selective eating is the little studied phenomenon of eating a highly limited range of foods, associated with an unwillingness to try new foods. Common in toddlers, it can persist into middle childhood and adolescence in a small number of children, most commonly boys. When this happens social avoidance, anxiety and conflict can result.

You may think I wouldn’t like that it’s most common in toddlers, but that doesn’t bother me. I’m more worried about the idea that this minor step, of just making a phone call and setting an appointment, could lead to me one day eating a salad or chicken or something gross like that. I’m excited to maybe, oh, grow up, but afraid I’ll throw up. And your momma comes around the corner and licks it up..wait, strike that last sentence.

Years of my parents, friends, co-workers and even a few strangers did little else, except annoy me and make me self-conscious. But hearing the Kyd’s questions the last year and a half, and realizing sarcasm had no impact as a self-defense mechanism is what really got the ball rolling here.

Hey, after this maybe I’ll learn to annunciate (get it?). Next thing you know, I’ll grow a couple of inches and wake up with a full head of hair. Maybe then the stock market will right itself. And monkey’s will fly out of my butt.