Hirpoooo

I really enjoy watching “How I Met Your Mother” and I consider it to be one of the best comedies on TV. Last night however, I realized that I could write for the series. They had a whole bit about girls “wooing.” Not wooing, as in courting or trying to win over someone, but that annoying sound we often hear from a group of women in their late teens and if they are especially retarded, into their early twenties. I blogged about it many moons ago, along with a few other pet peeves of mine.

Back in July of 2005, I posted my Top 10 List of things that annoy the shit out of me. Woohoo made that list, along with high fives; they came in at #7. “Woooo” is a version of the aforementioned “woohoo,” it’s really more of a regional thing I believe. Aside from the fact that the writers went to that well a few too many times and took it from the smart social commentary it was and made it as annoying as the actual phrase, I realized I could write for this show. Maybe even a few other shows, some shows I’d have to get paid more than others to write for, but we’re only talking an extra $10 or $20. Seriously, I think most of my rants (see: bitching) on this very site could be turned into episodes of a successful sitcom.

My last name even fits the requirements for being shown in the credits; it ends with “berg.”

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I have a bit of a conundrum at work. My boss has organized a team building activity, which ironically enough is being called “volunteer work,” even though the email specifically states that participation is not optional. The kicker is, we’re supposed to go to church, and not just any church, her church, to help staff backpacks full of food for kids who are in the unfortunate situation of not always getting a meal outside of school. The cause is a good one, and I have no qualms with doing something like that.

I do, however, have a beef with having to go to her church, or any church for that matter, for a work related function. So I’ve wrestled with saying something about how I feel it isn’t appropriate, which it isn’t, or biting my tongue and going along, or option three which results in me unexpected and unavoidable absence from work that day.

It’s been pointed out to me that a lot of good goes on at the church, which I don’t deny. And I highly doubt that there will be much preaching going on towards us, but any preaching while I’m at work is too much preaching. I highly doubt any of my co-workers would like to sit down and listen to my views, and better yet, I wouldn’t subject them to such an event. As I realize there’s a time and a place, and this isn’t either of those.

So as much as I find this awkward and potentially harmful to my career, I also find this pretty upsetting. That’s right, it upsets me. This angers me in fact. But as I think out my reactions to this, I see even more drama. If I say anything, I know the company would protect me, but I also think I’d be a bit ostracized. If I just go, I’ll be disappointed in myself for caving, and there’s still the possibility of a brain fart leading to some verbal diarrhea. I don’t think bringing up the fact that I didn’t ask anyone to die for my sins, or that I think I should own my sins, is going to win anyone over. Either one of those reactions causes me to be at the center of both an HR issue and piss off some coworkers who are way to comfortable talking about their beliefs.

My third option, where I some how being unable to come in that day has its own double edged sword, as we’re also supposed to go to lunch for my bosses boss’ birthday. Not that he’s really going to give a damn if I’m not there, but I don’t think it’s really smart to ever be the lone absent employee at a lunch like that.