Alrighty, I have me some questions here. Some issues that everyone deals with on a fairy regular basis. Basically, it's about social expectations and where to draw the line.
Say I'm going into a building, I see someone is behind me. But there's some serious distance between us. But not so much that I couldn't make eye contact. So, the question is: How long am I to wait holding the door for them? Should I totally break stride, sit around and count the cracks on the sidewalk? Or, is it like a five second rule? How much extra time can I wait if it's a cute female and not be the strange guy lurking? I'm telling you, it's a fine line. Then what is an acceptable response if I don't get a "thanks"? Does it depend on how long I held the door? Side note, if it's an office or a mall and there's two doors to enter before actually being inside. One thank you is enough. I always feel obligated to say it twice but really, I said it after the first door. So I appreciate the effort, then I say it again after door number two? Really? Did you think perhaps I didn't care anymore? I say the second thanks, I just don't think it's necessary.
Next question. Sitting in cubes, you hear someone near by sneeze. How close do you need to be to say bless you? Just those you can actually see from your desk? There's something weird about that ghost thank you, you're not real sure who said it. You say thanks but you don't even know who you thanked. Also, how long should you wait till saying bless you after a sneeze? This has bugged me since Seinfeld dealt with it. What if you have a multiple sneezer? I think the one bless you, much like the one thank you covers holding multiple doors, covers all sneezes.
Third and final question. Is it wrong to rev your engine and want to run someone over in a parking lot if they're taking their sweet ass time, and walking down the middle of your lane? I'm in a 2000 pound car, and you think you can win a game of chicken? Pedestrians get the right of way but, it's bullshit if they think that means they get a pass on being decent.
Gonna be a slow day at work. More posts could follow.
5 comments:
He's back!
1) She'll think you're a stalker no matter what you do - probably best to keep to the shadows instead of attempting to run ahead of her and open doors.
2) And it's also not a good idea to camp outside her cube and wait for her to sneeze, just so you can say "bless you"
3) Taking out her boyfriend with your 2000 lb. car may be a good idea, but he could still get up and lay into you - best to borrow my car to take care of business
There is no "she" they are just general questions you freak.
Okay then... "he"
Cmon 'chop. You know you're the only he/she for me.
Huh... and I thought you only liked Hersheys.
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