Gregg Hirpsterman??

So I finished that book already. This really isn't like me. I've never been an avid reader. Although every once in a while, someone will suggest something and actually talk me into reading it. And at that point, if I end up enjoying it, I'll quickly try to read everything the author ever wrote. I'll search the internet looking for obscure stories or columns. I contact their high school English teachers trying to get my paws on something they wrote freshman year. Okay, well that's not even close to true.

What's funny, or sad depending on how you look at it, is reading something I love makes part of me never want to try writing anything ever again. I can already see it having an impact on how I write, and even what I write. I feel like after reading that, nothing I write will be really original or really me. Just me trying to sound like Chuck Klosterman. Since I started reading it, I sound different in my own head. This guy fucked my entire internal monologue. Well, not totally. Truth is he doesn't sound all that different than I do. Or I don't think so anyway. And that's part of what I like about him so much. Sounding like me, makes me think he's a pretty bright guy. Only I'm not even close to as clever or insightful as he is.

In high school I had a pipe dream of being the next Mike Lupica. For those that don't know, he's a sports columnist from New York. Well, he was then. As well as a contributor to ESPN The Sports Reporters, now he's that as well as a novelist. Basically, the guy can write his ass off. He's short, Jewish and all about New York. So you could say we saw eye to eye. But then my buddy Mike got me hooked on The Sports Guy, Bill Simmons. Sports Guy once published some email exchange he had with this author. Some guy named Chuck Klosterman. Sure I thought his emails were funny but I just figured it was impossible to not sound funny when going back and forth with my new writing hero. Till a few years later Mr Porqchop lent me a copy of Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs. A copy I still haven't returned. What is it about a good book, CD or movie that I feel I should own it? Have it on display in some way in my apartment? Does it make me feel smarter and more sophisticated (you know I'll have to spell check that) or does it make me think I LOOK more smart. (yes that was intentional, funny huh?)

Anyway, what I'm saying is these guys who I end up really enjoying have a strange impact on me and my writing. Hell, I started up a blog BECAUSE of Sports Guy. He didn't write like he was as smart as Dennis Miller and talk over my head, he talked directly to me. And said things I said. Maybe a little funnier. But dude was speaking the language my friends and I speak. And yet at the same time, it makes me NOT want to write. Much as seeing a really good movie, kills the pipe dream I have of one day penning a screen play. If I ever am to sit down and write one, I want it to be original. And after seeing something that I really connect with, my first instinct is to write something like that. Totally related to my whole "the next" post from a few months back.

So I read Sports Guy, or Mr Chuck and I fight with myself over if I should write anything. Recently someone reads this here blog suggested they endorse me for a job as some writer type fella at their company. Which is a huge compliment. I'm pretty sure nothing is going to come from that directly but, maybe this blog will lead to some career opportunity down the road. Who knows? It's 50/50 ya know.

Now real quick, one more thing. Last night I got in bed, and flipped on the TV. TBS was playing Swingers. This blew my mind. And pissed me off. How the hell can TBS be playing one of the greatest indie movies of all-time? This isn't right. I know that by now, pretty much everyone has seen it so it's not really a underground cult favorite. But, TBS? Bravo would be fine. TBS shows Bad Boys every seven hours. Seeing Swingers on TBS is like seeing a really cute, cool chick who was always real shy and the fact that you knew here meant you were in on a great secret, and now she's dating some fucking cheese dick that isn't a bad guy but has no clue what he has. Or it's nothing like that at all. I know it sucks, I know that. And of course I watched it. By the way, how the hell is that movie over 10 years old now?!?! One day I'll post just about that movie.